Today I couldn't stop crying. I slept all day and only left my room once- and that was only because I knew I had to eat or I would be paying for it with a migraine. It's now one am here on the west coast. You are probably asleep over there.
Can I tell you that on different days I miss different things about us but today I miss getting ready for bed together? I always liked hopping in to bed as soon as you said "bed time" because I knew I had at least a half hour before you came to bed in which I could just sit and wind down. I always wanted to wind down before you got in so when you did get in to bed I could sidle up against you and just listen to you breathe.
My favorite moments with you were the quiet ones just laying down on a blanket in a park, reading next to each other in bed, walking for a late night scoop of ice cream. You were always running, always moving, and getting a glimpse of you just being still was a treat. I wish you were here to hold me. If you were here I would gently lay cheek on your neck and inhale. Over and over again.
I hope to hear from you soon, I hope one day maybe you can read these notes and it will be like you where here with me and not away.
Emm
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